22 March 2018
Paul Penrose


Paul Penrose - Finextra

307Posts 1,356,767Views 246Comments


A place to share stuff that isn't at all fintec related but is amusing, absurd or scary.

Crunch - the game for utter bankers

30 October 2009  |  3469 views  |  1

We missed this first time around, but it should definitely be on the Christmas shopping list for all self-respecting Finextra Community members.

Crunch - the game for utter bankers is a devious card game that places you at the head of the boardroom as a CEO of a global bank juggling the conflicting demands of your ailing bank and your future retirement fund.

First released in April, and brough to our attention by our good friend David Birch, the press release for Crunch says it all:

"An average game sees you bribing your way out of government investigations, fending off aggressive takeovers and forcing debt onto the unsuspecting public. Meanwhile, reward your hard work by taking inappropriate bonuses and - when no one's looking - brazenly embezzling your bank's own funds and hiding them about your person. Crunch is unique in that to win, players are coaxed into cheating.

"Of course, this doesn't do the health of your bank much good, but not to worry, because you can always call in a government bailout or two. The game ends when all banks are finally bankrupt, capitalism has all but collapsed and it's time to count up that well-earned personal fortune: The richest CEO wins.

If it sounds immoral, it's meant to be. But as Dave Birch says it also serves a dual purpose: "I bought it for fun, but in playing it the kids asked a lot of questions about the credit crunch, about the relationship between assets and debt, and about the idea of deliberately growing your workforce and assets to become too big to fail (adding "workforce" cards also gains you "trust" cards, [which you can then trade in for bail-out funds])."

Yes, I know it's a bit early to be talking about Christmas, but that doen't stop the forces of commerce from ramming it down your throat. Out local Co-op had their Christmas aisle - bedecked in garish tinsel decorations - up and running on the 1st of October, which must be a new record.

TagsRetail bankingWholesale banking

Comments: (1)

A Finextra member
A Finextra member | 02 November, 2009, 08:55

There's a problem, though.  If all banks are bankrupt and capitalism has all but collapsed, that personal fortune may not be worth anything much.  Better to have invested in land, guns, farming skills, grandchildren - anything but paper wealth - if you are gambling with the future of capitalism. 

Be the first to give this comment the thumbs up 0 thumb ups! (Log in to thumb up)
Comment on this story (membership required)

Latest posts from Paul

ANZ and Visa lose the plot

30 June 2011  |  6757 views  |  0 comments | recomends Recommends 0 TagsMobile & onlineRetail banking

Don't give up the day job...ever

20 May 2010  |  5992 views  |  0 comments | recomends Recommends 0 TagsTrade executionWholesale bankingGroupWhatever...

Now we are ten

19 April 2010  |  6360 views  |  3 comments | recomends Recommends 0 TagsRetail bankingWholesale banking

Finextra's Best of the Web

05 March 2010  |  5876 views  |  1 comments | recomends Recommends 0 TagsRetail bankingWholesale banking

The ATM was the last great financial innovation

25 February 2010  |  10016 views  |  8 comments | recomends Recommends 0 TagsRetail bankingWholesale bankingGroupFinance 2.0

Paul's profile

job title Head of Research
location London
member since 2007
Summary profile See full profile »
I'm responsible for editorial content and quality control across the full range of Finextra media.

Paul's expertise

Member since 2006
307 posts246 comments

Who's commenting on Paul's posts