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Dear Banks, You Suck and I Love You

Dear Banks,

Thank you for your branches. For the long queues, the tasteless coffee and the free crackers while I have to wait for two weeks in your branch to open a bank account.

Thank you for clearing cheques in five days. Thank you for the hidden and exorbitant fees. Thank you for building security features that are so secure, even I’m not clever enough to login to my own bank account.

Thank you for designing confusing customer service mazes to unblock my card when traveling. Oh, and thank you for building the mobile and web apps so that I can’t tell you when I’m traveling!

Thank you for caring about my security. So much, that you require me to carry around an obese 1997 mobile-phone to login to my account. 

Thank you for charging me 3€ to have my yearly statement sent by post to my address.

Thank you for sending me paper-mail, even though I’ve opted for paperless years ago.

Thank you for not connecting to the other apps I use to do my accounting, cash-flow management and everything else I need in my personal and business life.

Thank you for refusing to innovate. Thank you for refusing to be bold. Thank you for making banking really difficult.

Thank you for being who you are. Because if you weren’t, our small fintech family would have a hard time being in business.


Thanks to everyone who helped me write this. 




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