Mars News 2015 Citi read first

Due to a total failure of trust in financial instruments, HomoDuoCerebrus Inc, makers of military grade humanoid warrior robot 'Wally the Robot' has teamed up with the Bank of Mars to provide a valet buying service. Simply use your anonymous Bank of Mars card and make any purchase from any merchant anywhere and give the provided false address to the merchant. Wally the Robot will take the payment in gold bullion to the merchant and extract the goods in exchange.
Bank of Mars provides an extended warranty service on all goods and Wally comes in real handy when it comes to taking an item back and extracting a refund - in bullion.
Wally the Robot currently comes in a basic model with titanium ceramics and kevlar armour, acoustic percussion, laser and canons, Bose 1000w speakers and a 3:15 second loop of Barry Manilow song highlights.
HomoDouCerebrus Inc  makers of robots.

Bank of Mars is proud to announce that its cards are now accepted everywhere without suitable defensive measures.

Bank of Mars - Leaders in non-negotiable instruments and financial services. 

Internet Drop-shipping and now Drop-Buying with citi valet service?

My initial take on this is - So the card company will help you 'pretend' you are someone or somewhere else because the merchant won't accept your card from that location and will even 'help' you by shipping the item to you via their buyer 'drop' from somewhere the merchant trusts.

Innovative?

Why won't the merchants accept the cards/buyers?

Trust is absent.

Will 'pretending' really help in the long run?

* 'Drop shipping' is where you build a website and offer goods, often sourced from a location not trusted by buyers, without ever stocking any goods, and pass (drop) the order to the other merchant who will ship it to buyer 'pretending' it's from you, and giving you a commission.